Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Please use this forum for late breaking news only. Developing news stories such as traffic accidents, fires, severe weather, road conditions, crime in progress, and things of that nature should be posted here.

Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby Protagonist » Tue Dec 06, 2011 8:37 pm

It appears that the CJE (and members of the Harlan Fiscal Court) have launched a new, aquaculture campaign at the Lynch fish hatchery. According to sources, Risk Management Director (Tony Felosi) has petitioned the fiscal court to begin marketing sea monkeys.

According to Felosi, this very inexpensive brine shrimp can be grown, harvested and packaged for export to U.S. markets. Felosi says that this can replace the beloved household pet, the dog for some, the household cat for others.

Felosi believes that, in these difficult economic times, Harlan Countians (as well as Americans) should be able to have the enjoyment of the family pet (pets) without having the cost incurred from expensive foods, vaccinations and veterinary bills, associated with the household pet.

The CJE, along with members of the fiscal court, agreed to provide funding to begin the harvesting and exportation of the brine ship, aka "Sea Monkey".

Felosi believes that Harlan County is "missing the boat" in this highly lucrative aquaculture market. According to Felosi's statistics, presented to the Harlan Fiscal Court, the cost of packaging and marketing the "Sea Monkey" would be extremely cheap, but the economic return would total in the hundreds of thousands in the first year of "Sea Monkey" marketing.

The CJE agreed with Felosi's findings, stating to those present that this new, emerging aquaculture market could provide dozens of high paying jobs for Harlan Countians.

Details of the business plan, which is to be submitted by Felosi to the fiscal court before the end of 2011, is rumored to cost county taxpayers an initial $250K.

However, the CJE and several members of the fiscal court believe this will fulfill a campaign promise, made by the CJE in 1998 (while a candidate for elected office) of bringing new, natural and emerging economic markets to Harlan County.

On a personal note, I can't wait to submit my application for a job at the fish hatchery harvesting "sea monkeys".
Protagonist
 
Posts: 240
Joined: Wed Nov 23, 2011 9:54 am

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby DarkFairy » Tue Dec 06, 2011 9:12 pm

I clicked on this and really expected to see some type of sarcastic joke....lol
“One of the greatest delusions in the world is the hope that the evils in this world are to be cured by legislation”
Thomas Brackett Reed
User avatar
DarkFairy
 
Posts: 6672
Joined: Wed Jun 10, 2009 1:03 pm

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby clark bailey » Tue Dec 06, 2011 9:41 pm

LOL...Just to be sure, this is a joke--right?
User avatar
clark bailey
 
Posts: 2237
Joined: Tue Jan 26, 2010 9:00 pm

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby Skyedancer » Tue Dec 06, 2011 9:48 pm

Oh goodie I'm not the only one confused!! :lol:
User avatar
Skyedancer
Rainbow Bright
 
Posts: 1385
Joined: Mon Oct 19, 2009 9:10 pm
Location: Harlan

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby GFunkMoneyDog » Tue Dec 06, 2011 10:09 pm

That has to be a joke!!!!!
"The darkest souls are not those which choose to exist within the hell of the abyss, but those which choose to break free from the abyss and move silently among us." - Dr. Samuel Loomis
User avatar
GFunkMoneyDog
The Godfather
 
Posts: 20950
Joined: Tue Jun 09, 2009 9:59 am

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby Protagonist » Tue Dec 06, 2011 10:16 pm

Time will tell.
Protagonist
 
Posts: 240
Joined: Wed Nov 23, 2011 9:54 am

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby Protagonist » Tue Dec 06, 2011 10:20 pm

GFunkMoneyDog wrote:That has to be a joke!!!!!



Funk, they did give several hundred thousand dollars to Tony "Joe's flunky" Felosi to open the failed fish hatchery. Everyone knows (and thought) that was a joke earlier this year.

Now, why would anyone not take this story seriously?
Protagonist
 
Posts: 240
Joined: Wed Nov 23, 2011 9:54 am

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby jeepers creepers » Tue Dec 06, 2011 10:29 pm

I heard they were going to invest in a llama farm on some of the reclaimed land.
"If we concentrated on the really important stuff in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles"
User avatar
jeepers creepers
(no custom rank chosen)
 
Posts: 2307
Joined: Tue Jun 09, 2009 6:47 pm
Location: Wallins Creek

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby Protagonist » Tue Dec 06, 2011 10:31 pm

jeepers creepers wrote:I heard they were going to invest in a llama farm on some of the reclaimed land.



Bahahaha!!! :lol: Don't give that group any ideas.
Protagonist
 
Posts: 240
Joined: Wed Nov 23, 2011 9:54 am

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby GFunkMoneyDog » Tue Dec 06, 2011 10:34 pm

The county should invest in ostridge farm so they can bury their heads in the sand like many voters.
"The darkest souls are not those which choose to exist within the hell of the abyss, but those which choose to break free from the abyss and move silently among us." - Dr. Samuel Loomis
User avatar
GFunkMoneyDog
The Godfather
 
Posts: 20950
Joined: Tue Jun 09, 2009 9:59 am

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby the fluke » Wed Dec 07, 2011 5:34 am

they must have eaten all trout.
the fluke
User avatar
the fluke
Mountain Man
 
Posts: 2600
Joined: Mon Jul 20, 2009 9:41 pm

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby tattooed freak » Wed Dec 07, 2011 8:12 am

I was in the CJE's office the other day and overheard parts of a conversation talking about tilapia and other fish, and how the system was going to work, and blah blah blah. So there actually may be some truth to this. Unfortunately.
User avatar
tattooed freak
 
Posts: 119
Joined: Wed Jun 10, 2009 2:56 pm

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby clark bailey » Wed Dec 07, 2011 12:20 pm

I heard a rumor that renowned shrimp "expert" Mykelti Williamson was being called in to help with this project.....


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09KL2HUXE6Q
User avatar
clark bailey
 
Posts: 2237
Joined: Tue Jan 26, 2010 9:00 pm

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby gonegone » Wed Dec 07, 2011 9:34 pm

Is this the same Tony Felosi that had the trucking company?
gonegone
 
Posts: 195
Joined: Thu Jun 11, 2009 7:33 pm

Re: Lynch Fish Hatchery To Begin Marketing Sea Monkeys

Postby Angry Whiteguy » Wed Dec 07, 2011 9:42 pm

gonegone wrote:Is this the same Tony Felosi that had the trucking company?

Damn I hope so one is more than enough....
Your government is your master!!! Resistance is illegal, and futile!!!
User avatar
Angry Whiteguy
ReSiDeNt EvIl
 
Posts: 15725
Joined: Thu Sep 10, 2009 3:25 pm
Location: The Dark Side Of The Moon

Next

Return to BREAKING NEWS

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Bing [Bot], Google [Bot] and 11 guests